How big is my "bigger" heart?

When things keep repeating and its like hurting everyone involved, just dunno how long I can say the sentence.."I will accept this with a bigger heart". How big is that bigger heart that I have decided to have since that day to remember? Life is full of ups and downs that even human aren't able to conquer their own emotion and thinking, sometimes need to burst to people surround them, and only those who care will stay behind. Trying very hard sometime to withstand these pain feel eventhough I can just walk away and stay alone quietly and lonely. However, it's someone u have decided to love, then u have to love them till the end. The heart just have to choose either to keep going or give up....

Dissapointed

When it comes to relationship, ntg is more important than love and trust. When it comes to family, ntg is more important than love and trust. This equals family=relationship. When u r putting someone as your family, u believe that d other person also treat u as family member. The best of all is without having to say anything the other side wil know what are you thinking. But in this world, it doesn't seems that the person must b ur loved one or family. I dunno if that's what I want or what I can give.

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My name is 汪汪

A day to remember

Maybe some ppl might think that what I'm thinking now is wrong n I should b positive n try to do my best to make things work perfectly. But isn't it going to be hard and every1 will continue to feel like living a very unhappy n suffering life? No one would choose to b unhappy, even it comes to d closest ones. Our life is just as short, why would we choose d harder way when we have d ability and option to choose d more comfortable one? Sometime I just feel tired for every1 involved, every1 just like acting, fulfilling what we are suppose and need to do. It's not a what we want to do only, but to think for everyone and all the consequences. Maybe it looks sad to decide it that way, but the scar will keep remind us day to day until d day we finally take up our brave to face the truth that it has come to d last sort. Struggling would just make everyone more sad.

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Name: Frogbit

A combination of green frog with white rabbit = frogbit..:-P

Super duper full with cheese! Yucks..

Cheezy wedges suppose to be one of my favourite among the foods offered in KFC. Anyhow that day Shao Yin go out and da bao dinner for me in Desa Ilmu. This time the sauce, walaueh even more than the wedges.. too much that makes me feel bit geli,.. KFC, should you maintain your products' quality and consistency in order to sustain your reputation and confidence among your existing and potential customers..

Cute baby rabbits!:-D

Saw them in the Amazing Pets but its not for sale..they sell the mummy but the babies dunno, maybe got people booking already.. So cute the baby licked its' paw and seems like baby rabbit is bit insensitive, they only realize our presence when we touched them and they seems like getting a shock, haha..

A maze

D nite seems v long, v long.. Something keeps repeating in my mind, my sense of logic n the voice of the heart keep battling against each other which sometimes I wish I could just keep one of them. Suppose the new page is giving me lot of new things and happiness, but im still afraid to make any steps that is more than this. I feel like i just dunno what I could give when I'm not even sure what I want to give. When the truth always hurts eventhough sometimes it causes happiness too, whichever it is, it is still the truth..i'm too timid and I must have admit it. I deserve a punishment or need a guidance. Maybe an open channel that can help me conquer and go through this maze.

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Today 16th Jan 2010, tomorrow 17th Jan 2010

Happy Birthday to Ah Bing Go who's going to celebrate his "YY" birthday eventhough this year we aren't celebrating with him as he's working in Bintulu. Why I called it YY-- that's what I "understand" from Joa, who's not studying Biology in Form 4. Since normally we called someone unknown or unidentified as XX, which in Biology, this refer to female's chromosome- I didn't know anything more in detail, haha.. So, the very next time ehem, mayb we shall refer guys as Y n girl as X..Haha..

My special wisdom teeth..+.+

Today at first thought I will end up missing one of my wisdom tooth, which actually suppose won't give very much pressure on me.. Anyhow today end up doing nothing, pay Rm5 for checking up which exchange with a big news (maybe for me), that I need to extract 2 wisdom teeth through surgery!.. I should have say it's a very difficult fact that I have to accept but somehow in the mind, I had expected I won't have a easier life than this. This 1 extraction will cost me 550 bucks, means times 2, so will b 1.1k.. Dunno why that time I didn't worry about the pain that I will going to suffer after the surgery, just can't accept at the very moment that it is really a big deal. Even the surgeon said the surgery is a bit complex as the position of the tooth is not very ideal. Thus, I did feel panic that time but he say can complete in 35 minutes, which I think should be OK for me to stand the surgery duration. I will be watching the operation, the sounds n all the machines' operating.. He told me that he will cut the upper half and then extract the root. Sounds my skins are scattering and shivered..6th March first surgery...awaiting

Welcoming 2010!!

Maybe we always found the unexpected in the life and even no way to understand or interpret how it happens. It will anyhow happen and we are enjoying ourselves. Maybe the rest of the people will think it is unbelievable and how could that happen, even me myself can't explain it, but that's what is going to take place and change my life. Let the track on moving and maybe we will discover something new and happy..:-)..Wish my family and friends to have a new beginning and blessing throughout the year.

Singapore X'mas 2009 (1)

This vacation brought happiness and also tiredness in all of us. Eventhough Singapore is a small country, but the place is really a nice place to stay as the country is really CLEAN! Maybe because of the attitude and culture where Singaporean really likes the country to be clean, or because of the penalty for littering etc..? Anyhow it is really comfortable and much more cleaner than our own country, this we all have to admit that. No matter in small and not much developed area such as Little India, the place still clean and just as nice. Even you are walking during midnight time, you won't feel so afraid of people disturbing or trying to rob you (eventhough I'm not clear on the security and crime rate in the country). We went there for X'mas celebreation anyhow the funny thing is we missed the parade. They have parade around 5 pm which we are still in the mall as we expect parade should be around midnite and everyone is enjoying the few minutes towards Christmas just like the new year countdown. Since we are not able to witness the parade, thus we just continue to squeeze ourselves among the crowd that floading Orchard Road. Along the streeet around 4 km, the giant shopping complexes are just next to each other and we only manage to visit through less than half before we surrender due to foot pain. That same morning we have been to Singapore Zoo till 5pm before we get down to shopping. Everywhere is lights and decorations that seems they threw in a huge budget to beautify the country during special occasion that attract the tourists from other countries. We bump into a lot of Malaysians too..

Christmas Party in Half-Way Home

My vegetarian food...=.="

Slideshow and gifts...


Group Photo- Boss in the middle with chairman frm the association on the left. Residents wearing Christmas hat.

Today Half-way Home Residents is enjoyed their Christmas Party organised by Taiwan Buddhist Tsu-Chi Association. Eventhough I felt very weird as they organised this celebration which suppose is by Christian, so at first still thinking what would they sing? Christmas song? In the end, they just sang their own songs and I dun feel any Christmas's joyous atmosphere being created. Anyhow they are just completing their mission and of course we welcome them as those residents in Half-Way Home be very happy since got a lot of people celebrating with them, provides foods, gifts, and entertainment as they are mostly being aboondan by their family after being discharged from the hospital. It's a good thing after all..

P/S: Anyhow they are too nice that give me a plate of those vegetarian food which more than half of the food I didn't eat and cannot accept it.

Lee's homecook

Christmas's candle deco..

Today suppose is not a very good day for me.. However, in the end I end up making cheese baked rice, erm big sis's special request. Thus, we went to buy those ingredients- main ingredients such as mozarrella cheese and beef. Done all, eat..just as that simple.:-p

Night operation in the sPring..:-p

One of those shops that has closed in that floor.. The little white doggy pendant looks much like Blackie! Just opposite in colour..Omg!

Joa next to Christmas tree..:D

Raptai..

Site preparation

After finish watching "Zombieland" in MBO last night, me and Joa have to wait till sis finishes her movie "Avatar" which starts at the same time. Anyhow their movie is almost 1 and half hour longer than ours, thus we just exporing around that 2nd floor. We saw some people still busy working, preparing for the next day show (raptai) or exhibition. They are those working when the mall is close for public (except the cinema). Seems like everyone is working hard to make the ends meet. We are so fortunate.

木木小屋- Strongly NOT recommended

Nice hanging but the words doesn't bring any special message to me..

"Just defrozen sio be"

Pale looking barley

Sis's oily bihun

My so-called "Thai Fried Mee"

That day just feel hungry and Joa is meeting people, so just drop by a cafe which look quite nice in renovation and environment, name double wood house in Padungan. When look at the menu, ok it's not much special things to eat, plus they offer 10% off from total bill for dine-in 10am-2pm. Thus, I just roughly chosen the "Thai Fried Mee" and Barley drink and Sis ordered Fried Bihun I think with Teh-C-Peng. Anyhow my fried mee turned out to be "Thai Instant Fried Mee". The mee is no different from "mi segera" like Maggie mee.. N the most important thing is it is not spicy at all and it is too OILY. Tried my best but can't finish this oil. Anyhow I thk sis's bihun is even worse that she give up too. Ok, deep fried "sio be" suppose wont be too bad I thought bt I was wrong from the very first bite I had. It's just eating a cold, frozen yet oily food, dunno if it should be called "food". The barley even had a very weird smell, seems that they have keep it frozen for a LONG time..Poor little house, I think they should have change their servings to keep alive.

Kuli for a morning..

Today woke up at 6 sent Big sis to airport- going to Miri/Lawas outstation. SO sleepy while driving back. Then when home, thought to continue my dream, no longer after that mom came to wake us up..Going to move the stocks- seeds and fertilizers and all the equipment that have taken place in the house for almost a year to the new "factory"- light industrial estate. Anyhow, this time Boss decided to rent a light-industrial shophouses for 2K, I dunno whether it is worth for him as he always change his mind so fast like in Katy Perry's Song - Hot n Cold. Seems today his mood also up and down making us all bit tension, making little mistake being scold till bit angry, dun wan to help him anymore. Whatever, in the end women are all soft-hearted, n this not only true on me, but on sis n mom.. Anyhow, today I still able to manage my energy- mayb got extraordinary power up "injection" so, eventhough the things are so heavy and I'm sooo sleepy in the car regardless I'm driving or not. It's quite tiring but finally see the house looks like a house rather than a factory is still a happy moment!

What's your name?

Leggy froggy? eto,,,,,,, I'm out of idea on cute cute name for this time after named Buniu--/ Boniu..

haha...

The whole afternoon I have wasted my time in down down as unable to find the documents that I once type it in July/ August 2009. Think my memory is getting low, low and lower...=.=".. I just think that this time sure die, boss sure scold me stupid or smtg related. Searching high n low in one after another computers that I might have stored it, but in mind do not have the confidence that this document will be found. Guess what, in the end take up my last bravety to sms boss that I lost the document. Boss thought that I had emailed it before so asked me to find in email, however guess my memory say no to this statement, and proven it is not in the email either. In the end, boss call me up and say he managed to get the document back from the supplier. I should be happy and in the other way, he should have told me earlier that there is another way to get back this doc. Anyhow, i was trained to sacrifice my lunch for this, and maybe one day I will be graduated from this training..:D. However, the best thing is someone sang a song for me to cheer me up which I couldn't believe that got people don't know how to sing a complete ABC song!..Anyhow, thanks so much to make me alive again..Haha. Awaiting to hear the next song ...

Postponed date..

Today, as it is Monday, first planning is to settle my Passport. If not, scared not able to get it before my trip to Singapore this coming Christmas! So, get a leave from boss for few hours to get it done. Anyhow, surprise surprise my luck still haven't come.. thought it was just an ordinary traffic jam around Simpang 3 roundabout as it was around 9am. So just be patient lo, but later who knows when reach the junction, saw every cars going to the same way.. Reach the gate, saw the BIG banner " seminar bla bla bla on 7 to 8 dec 09.." ok., guess won't so much ppl cum for such boring seminar..turn in the parking lots,,omg..full house so better turn out..give up so need to cum back for the next next day..huh..