BZ holiday--

Since 13th November 2009, I start my holiday which I dunno if that is consider a holiday..Anyhow, I should have get used to it since I learnt to admit and accept myself as the daughter to my parents and responsibility to this family. Of course that what a family should be, together and at all time be tolerable to each other so as to maintain the best atmosphere in the family.

Sometime I claimed myself to be like a bird in a cage, without any freedom. Actually is not sometime, should be always. Until now I'm thinking, at my age of 22 years old, what have I done without family by my side? How much thing I have involved in without any of my famiy members? Did I ever try to stay outside the house for more than 1 week without getting any contact from family? Of coz, I came out with an empty list. It's not about whether how far can I achieve it, but is whether I am able to come out with the first step, of course not me to decide when to make this first step, but when am I allowed to make this first step. Since I start to know the word freedom, I always asked myself, does this means a lot to me? Not by saying I should get rid the whole family, but is whether the trust to give the freedom to me, or am I not worth for this little right? When it should be the right time for me to get this right? Or is it forever I'm tide with this name, I am tied to this fate?

I do feel lucky to be in the family, of course there's a lot of memories to remind the importance of family members. Somehow, does that means friends and other people in my life is not important at all? In life why I have to be limited to get connected with other people besides family?